How I Met Your Mother
This week Ted found himself on a hauntingly familiar blind date. It turned out that he had been on that exact same date with the same girl seven years earlier. Neither of them remembered the other until part way through the date when Ted made a pun about sharing oysters (“because if you didn't, that would be shellfish.”). She remembers that he was snobby, and he remembers that she dresses up her cats in weird costumes (what? Took likes to wear that tie, we swear!).
"We've done a complete lap of all the single people in New York, only to end up back here with each other." – Ted
They decide to retrace the steps of that first date so that they could learn from their mistakes and not end up on another blind date 7 years in the future. It turns out that she talked too much about her ex-boyfriend and her cats, and she didn’t do the check-dance at the end of the date. Ted, however, made fun of spelling errors in the menu, made bad puns, didn’t offer her his jacket when she was freezing, came off as a player (she thought he was checking out another girl, but he was actually checking out Mustache Marshal – more on that later), and he didn’t call her after the date. They imagine what could have happened if all those little annoyances had gone differently, including a wedding with cats dressed as bride’s maids, and this:
They decided that it was all for the best, because let’s face it – Ted likes pointing out typos and making puns, and she will always talk about her cats. They’ll hold out for finding someone who likes their quirks, not settle for someone who tolerates him.
Meanwhile, Barney tricks Marshal into coming to the strip club with him (he tells him they’re going to the Origins of Chewbacca "Star Wars" exhibit). Marshal says that he can’t fantasize about other women without feeling guilty. So first he has to set-up an elaborate fantasy of Lily dying of a rare but “medically legitimate” hiccup condition. Marshal vows to be the wingman of Marshal’s mind and tells him to put Lily completely out of his mind as he watches the next stripper. Easier said than done – the stripped looks exactly like Lily.
“I'm going to make Marshall watch as I wedge Ulysses S. Grant between his wife's tatas." - Barney
Later they find Lily and Robin at the bar to tell them they have found “the third doppelganger.” Voice-over Ted explains that they had found Lesbian Robin, Mustache Marshal, and now Stripper Lily. We’re told that they find the other two doppelgangers later that summer. While Lily finds this “awesome”, Robin is less than pleased that Barney was at a strip club. Marshal also admits to Lily that in order to fantasize about other women he needs to pretend she’s tragically died. Lily said it was fine to fantasize, but “don’t kill me off!” The four of them make their way to the strip club together and Lily is very excited to see her stripper self. She even buys herself and Marshal some private time with Stripper Lily. Robin, however, is less than pleased with how well everyone at the strip club knows Barney. Robin doesn’t like this whole strip club thing one bit, and they’re going to need to seriously talk about it. Awwww, like a real couple of something! Nice!
This post was brought to you by Lesbian Robin
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